So called adds Queneau because when the little King of Siam had come
("So called," adds Queneau, "because when the little King of Siam had come on a visit to France and been taken to a concert, what he liked best had been the bit at the beginning where the violins and other instruments were all tuning up...")The action, such as it is, involves the hopeless passion of one Bernard Lehameau for an English WAAC girl in uniform called Helena Weeds, but most of the time the characters drift around discussing the war's progress. I HAVE just been reading a First World War novel by - no, not by Sebastian Faulks or Pat Barker, but by a Frenchman who was actually alive when the Great War happened. I have been reading a little-known novel called Un Rude Hiver (A Hard Winter) by Raymond Queneau, which so appealed to me when I first read it that I find myself rereading it once every five years or so. It's a strange, sad, funny, little story set in Queneau's home town of Le Havre at a time (about 1917) when the Allies and Germans had not yet thought of bombing it into modernity. No need for Brighton to start sweating just yet."It would be nice if there were more for young people to do" says Louisa wistfully "Still, there's always the National Lottery.".
But it doesn't go to the right things."Stacey agrees: "There's more for the elderly lot. And they get irritated by the noise, so clubs have to close down earlier."Profitability may be soaring, but it looks as though it will take some time for the rest of the town to fulfil such a lucrative reputation. They sit around on benches and in tea rooms, making the most of the mild weather before the season draws to an end."I've never noticed that this town is prosperous" says Elsie, 70, out with two friends. "They come in, spend their money and then go back again." Her friend, Pam, chips in: "If you ask me, the place has lost a lot in the last few years, with all those new-fangled shopping centres and the smaller shops going.
It's taken the character away."Further along the seafront, at Worthing's equivalent to Brighton's "Grand", Lillian and Sylvia, in their seventies, are settling down to some sewing over a morning coffee. Louisa and Stacey, both 18 and at college, stick out like sore thumbs in one of Worthing's seafront pubs - chiefly because they're under 60 years old."There's not a lot to do, clubbing-wise," admits Louisa "You tend to go to Brighton for that There is money around, definitely. Not like Brighton - I hate that place."The real challenge, it seems, is to locate Worthing's flourishing younger population - which is supposedly breathing new energy into an old resort. After a fairly arduous hunt, it becomes clear that they are pretty thin on the ground. "It feels welcoming here, but not particularly wealthy," says Sylvia Lillian agrees "I like it because it's so quiet. And while the more entrepreneurial residents boast of an influx of lively young things and a dwindling elderly population, 20 minutes in the town centre confirms the exact opposite.In this light, reports of a new tiger economy seem a little far-fetched - more enthusiastic Labrador, maybe. We offer high quality that people like paying for," he says firmly, despite the fact that there are enough old people walking past his shop to keep him shampooing non- stop for a week.
But that's not the sort of clientele that interests him.Which leaves you wondering whether Worthing is a town in serious denial - or at least suffering from a split personality: Milton Keynes aspirations with Bournemouth demographics. Elderly couples stroll along the sea front past the sedate- looking ice-cream parlours and the pavilion, where you can catch an afternoon tea dance or watch Hinge and Bracket. It was a missed opportunity Lancashire were to regret, although they kept Derbyshire's progress in check, with Wasim coming back after his untidy first spell to remove Dominic Cork and Vince Clarke on either side of the lunch interval, both with his trademark toe-crushing yorker.By then, Cassar was well established, moving to his 50 by pushing Ian Austin away to leg for two and then hammering Gary Keedy for a mighty six. New companies have moved in, with young families."So there's not much demand for blue rinses, then? He looks vaguely appalled by the idea "Blue rinses? Ooh no, certainly not.